Most of the pieces are there for me to fall for Chris Evans. He has the dark-hair-and-light-eyes combo that I love. He has an accent (Boston). He seems to genuinely care about his fans and most people say he’s a nice guy. But for some reason, I can never quite get on board. I think it’s because Chris always seems like sort of a whiner? And while he has legit anxiety issues, he also comes across as a complete neurotic. Those aspects of his personality sort of kill whatever crush I might have had for him. And those aspects are front and center in Chris’s new Rolling Stone interview. Captain America: Civil War opens in America today, after already opening internationally and raking in tons of money. And while Chris is grateful, he’s also… just so damn neurotic.
He hates doing premieres: “A red carpet lasts, what, 30 minutes tops? But that to me is like 30 minutes of walking on hot coals. It’s not like a junket – junkets you sit in a room and they bring ’em in. I can do that all day and not have a meltdown. But the premiere – that’s overwhelming. It’s the volume of it: You’re in the center of this thing. You can fight a whole army if they line up one at a time. But if they surround you, you’re f–ked.”
Marvel wanted him for nine movies: “It’s nuts. If you make a big movie like Independence Day, they’ll lock you up for three movies. But nine is insane. We got it down to six.”
He didn’t want to be Captain American because of the promotional work: “This is the most outside asks you can incorporate into a movie. I love acting – but that’s not all you’re asking me to do. I’ve been dreading press since January. It’s nice to talk about the work with people who are interested – but I freak out when I hear stupid questions about stupid things, and you’ve gotta act like you give a f–k. It’s part of the job, I’ve got to sell this thing. But it’s just a gross feeling. It makes me insecure… I don’t like having silly surface discussions. A lot of times that’s required in this business. That’s when the social anxiety kicks in. When you feel kind of un-invested, like you’re playing some sort of game you know you shouldn’t be playing. You’re making just more noise, and more trash, and almost selling something, and nothing of this is clean. It’s all a river of garbage, and you’re just in it.”
His anxious brain goes quiet when he’s acting: “The noise goes away. You’re just leaned into the experience. You’re really riding the wave of just living… That’s an incredibly douche-y thing to say. Please don’t put that in there. Ugh! ‘Riding the wave of just living’? No! F–k!”
Whether Cap has had sex: “At this point, he probably has. He has to have. But he’s respectful – he never talks about it…He’s a little vanilla. He’s a good man, but he’s not exactly flashy. He doesn’t have the great one-liners; he’s not flying around shooting missiles. He’s probably not the one your kids want to dress up as. So it’s tricky.”
He’s not big on LA: “I don’t knock L.A. But L.A. is where I come to work, where I have meetings and, unfortunately, where I feel moments of anxiety. Sometimes L.A. is great. And sometimes you just drive down Sunset like, ‘Ugh. F–kin’ Hollywood.'”
Whether he wants kids: “I really want them. My sister has kids – they’re seven, five and three – and going home and being around them feels great. I’m really trying to have kids soon. Certain things have to fall in place.” Like what? Evans laughs. “Gotta find a wife.” He’s been linked to actresses including Minka Kelly, Lily Collins and a pre-Timberlake Jessica Biel, but right now, he says he’s single.
He’s on board for Avengers 4 with a big pay increase: “Oh, yeah. They didn’t punch their Chris Evans card – like, ‘You get the seventh one free!’ Yeah, no.”
The RS piece is littered with quotes from Robert Downey Jr., who seems to get a lot of pleasure from rolling his eyes at Chris’s neuroses. There are also lots of quotes from Scarlett Johansson, who is basically more of a hang-with-the-bros kind of person than Chris. ScarJo even says at one point, “Chris can be a delicate flower a little bit.” YA THINK? I understand that he has anxiety issues and he’s really uncomfortable with premieres and craziness, and for that, I really do have sympathy. His anxiety issues are very real and are likely overwhelming at the time. But I also think he needs a little bit of perspective, because his hyperbole is making my eye twitch. It’s JUST a premiere. It’s not walking on hot coals.
Photos courtesy of Peggy Sirota/Rolling Stone and WENN.
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